About Me 2017
Here’s a little bit more about me.
About Me 2017
Who am I?
Up until the birth of my children, I had always worked outside the home. I have a University Education, I was active in numerous sports, I loved many crafts and did quite a bit with my family genealogy. I was employed as an Operations Management in Retail (Future Shop, Ltd.) for many years but decided to transfer to a less active position after being hospitalized and finally diagnosed with Crohn’s Disease in 2001.
I chose to apply to work at Manulife Insurance, in their Customer Service Center and then later requested a transfer to their Claims Department because of my deteriorating health (multiple Crohn’s flare-ups and 6 surgeries for a large abscess and peri-anal disease). It was very difficult to be in a Call Center tied to a telephone when my Crohn’s Disease was active – especially when the disease itself was not ‘visible’ to those around me. It is hard to be understanding of a condition you cannot see.
Crohn’s Disease can be a completely invisible disease. Very few people, even now, know I have it and live with it on a day-to-day basis.
Manulife was a fantastic company to work for and after being in their Claims Department for a year, I was able to transfer to a work-from-home position. This allowed me to more easily manage my diseases and still work full-time. My diseases and abscess surgeries made me become much less active (having to be on my stomach for 9 months while the abscess opening healed didn’t help my mobility issues) and the drugs (steroids) used to manage my Crohn’s episodes helped me pack on some extra weight. It probably doesn’t help that I am also genetically predisposed to being overweight and have fought this my whole life…but the end result is the same – I am now very overweight.
It was at this time that my husband and I moved to Wellesley, Ontario to provide a home for my maternal Grandparents. They were in their late 80’s and they were no longer able to maintain their own home in Fonthill, Ontario. We purchased a home specifically to be able to provide them with a place to live. We wanted it to be in a quiet town like they were used to (we had been living in Kitchener) and for their in-law suite to be above ground (not in a dark basement). Wellesley was the perfect location and the house we found was exactly what we needed.
My Grandparents moved in with us in September 2007 and I continued to work for Manulife during this time. I was blessed with a job that allowed me to be at home and available for any emergencies with my Grandparents. I managed their day-to-day appointments and activities because Gramps could no longer drive. Nana was super independent and strong and she managed everything else that needed to be done.
Gramps was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s Disease very soon after he arrived with us and we managed his care at home, with the help of CCAC and Veteran’s Services for 3 years; until his care became too much for my Nana and I to handle alone. In November 2011 he was moved to a good Nursing Home in Milverton until his death in 2015. Nana remained with us in our home until her death in March 2012.
I was extremely close to my maternal Grandparents – you can probably guess this just by my willingness to ask them to move in with my husband and I – and I feel blessed I was able to provide a home for them and spend as much time as I was able to spend with them. My children were blessed to have their Great Grandparents at their “beck and call” and to know their unconditional love. I am blessed to have been there when Nana passed so she was not alone.
I have been struggling with sadness and grief since August 2007 and it has been a very real battle to me. I am going through a process called “Complicated Grief” – this is what the specialists call it and they compare it to almost a post-traumatic stress situation. I learned this after finally seeking to speak with a Grief Counselor in 2016. You see, I have been very blessed – not to experience death, or loss until my early 30’s. But this is also a double-edged sword…I was totally unprepared.
Beginning in 2001 we have lost one important person after another, a minimum of 1 immediate, or extended family member every year for the past 15 years. Having never really experienced death and then to become surrounded by death has been very overwhelming to me. The ‘Complicated Grief’ comes from 2 specific occasions where I was present at the time of death. My Dad succumbed to Metastasizing Kidney Cancer in 2007 and I was with him for the last 6 hours of his battle – listening to every rattling breath – until he passed. This was Complicated Death #1 for me. He was not ready to die – and we were not ready to lose him. Complicated Death #2 was when my Nana collapsed in my arms, in my home and I held her for 20 minutes as she slowly stopped breathing before the ambulance arrived. She had a “do not resuscitate” order and I didn’t realize I needed to have it on hand as soon as the ambulance arrived – or else they’d have to start resuscitation… It took less than 1 minute to get but they had already restarted her heart so she had to be transferred to the hospital – and then she had to be taken off life support once she got there. I’m still dealing with my grief over both of these losses on a daily basis and when I say grief I mean immobilizing, I can’t breath, or function, there is no air, kind of grief. I know I will get through this – but this struggle is my current reality. Talking about it is crazy hard but at the same time it helps me manage and come to terms with it.
These last 15 years have also been filled with more beauty and joy than I ever thought I would experience. My husband is my rock and I can not think of anyone else I’d rather spend the rest of my life with and we have two amazing children. Darla and Andrew are my joy and laughter. My family is my world.
I should probably mention here that I was diagnosed with Chronic Depression in my late teens and I have been treated for it ever since (for more than 30 years). Depression is an all encompassing disease which can strike at any time. For me it is a chemical imbalance in my brain and different environmental situations can trigger me into a deeper level of depression (like the Fall to Spring light situation in Ontario, Canada). Over the years I’ve learned some coping techniques (both mental and external like an SAD Lite) and I’ve also noticed queues in my own behaviors and thoughts which mean I’m going to need to seek some extra medical help managing the symptoms.
After the death of my Nana in March 2012 and my decision to stay at home and not return to work after Drew turned 1 year (April 2012) I started to crochet. A lot. Oombawka Design was created as a way for me to share my crochet projects with friends and family. Initially, I was crocheting and selling little stuffed toys. The name “Oombawka”, came from a word my daughter used for a little toy I was crocheting at the time – the Mini Meows (or Little Oombawkas). My daughter (who was almost 3 years old then) called them her ‘Oombawkas‘ – so when I was trying to decide what to call my blog I chose Oombawka because I was pretty sure no one else in the world had ever used the word before and because there was a personal meaning to me.
I honestly did not expect Oombawka Design to become a popular website, nor for it to become my full-time job! I am so happy it did 🙂 It is like a dream come true. I am able to stay at home which is perfect for managing my Crohn’s Disease and I am able to be there for my children before and after school – or even mid-day if they are are unwell and need to come home.
Oombawka Design is just me – when I say this I mean – I write the patterns, I crochet the projects, I take the photos and edit the photos for the tutorials, I film the YouTube videos and edit them and upload them and share them. I manage the social media sharing and the Facebook pages, I answer the emails…it is a one-woman show folks – no one is helping me with this site or the management of it. Every waking moment I am not with my husband or children I am Oombawka Design.
So, if it takes me a few moments to respond to your question – or all of a sudden you don’t hear from me online for a week – please know it is because something has come up at home. My husband and my children need me and I also have to try to remember to take care of myself. This year, 2017, I am trying to bring more balance to my life – I am walking 2 to 3 times a week, eating better and trying to get at least 7 hours sleep a night. I’m hoping this helps me become a stronger and healthier me 🙂
Read more about me here: https://oombawkadesigncrochet.com/about
Thank you Dolene ♥ I’m sorry to hear all that you’ve been going through. Thank you for your kindness to me – depression is that persistent dark shadow that hovers just out of sight isn’t it? Fall seems to be my ‘test’ time where it tries to grab the reins and take control. Trying to stay strong and hug every small happy moment close. Thinking of you, Rhondda
thank you Dolene ♥
Rhondda, I just today found your web page, and I’m so glad I did. I was deeply touched by your moving story of your illness and loss. This world is a very tough place, and you have had more than your share of problems and grief. I was impressed by how very strong you are. You have gone through so many sorrowful things in your life, and yet you still see beauty and create beauty. I understand depression. I have fought it all my life too. I am so glad you sought help, and I can see that you inherently know what to do to help yourself, simply by creating your crochet. You are a caring and loving soul. I started crocheting after I was diagnosed with stage 4 ovarian cancer. Because of the strong drugs I’ve taken over the last 4 years, I’ve had my gastrointestinal problems, too! Although nothing compared to yours. I admire your strength and persistence. I’m looking forward to all the wonderful things I expect to find on your website.
Oh GUURLLL I SO identify, empathize and sympathize with you! The fact you’re living with an “invisible ” disease/diseases which not many people understand oe even know about is one of the most difficult parts.
You never realize how strong you are until someone tells you that you DID/DO have a choice, when you never felt like you had one. For me, the only choice I ever thought I had was to “deal, figure it out and move on to the next issue ” I never, not once, thought anything different.
I’ve basically been on my own since I was 5yo. That’s not too say I didn’t have people around me. However, it is, was,and probably always will be up to me, to take care of “it”, whatever “it” is.
I was diagnosed with clinical depression back when few people talked about it. About 10 years into my diagnosis my Ah Ha moment came when I realized I took meds because my pancreas, thyroid and other organs didn’t work right. 💡WHY would or should I or anyone feel shame due to the brain having the same problem! It doesn’t work righ! That was a defining moment for me.
Like you , my intestinal problems began before my teen years. Fast forward MANY tests, many years, lots and lots of pain. Over the years I know what I can and can’t eat. Prepared foods are a prescription for pain, bloat, swelling, constipation etc. At 61yo I found a Dr that described what I feel like before I could tell him! Pure joy filled me! Maybe…just maybe I’ll get the intestinal thing under control!
I’ve been crocheting so long, as long as I can remember, I have no idea who or when I was taught. I’m a bit of a pack rat,,,my kids say hoarder lol. I think I have every color of every kind of yarn possible!! Because you never know what will be on the hook (or hooks, because I have at least 3 of every size and more of my “go to” hooks! Crocheting haa kept me sane, or at least as sane as possible lol!
Crocheting and my dog! Doesn’t get any better than that!
Thanks for sharing your story. It really touched me. I also got into crocheting when I was trying to cope with a difficult medical diagnosis. I started crocheting amigurumi and found it was a good way to clear my mind of all the constant ‘thoughts’. Thank you for starting this blog. I discovered it through your master beanie post, which is fantastic. I appreciate the level of detail you provide. I hope you are doing well these days. Take care.
Hi Di, Yes I have used BLsc as back loop single crochet in some of the patterns. (single crochet in the back loop of the stitch – which is the loop farthest from you when you look at the two loops on top of the stitch). It should be listed in the abbreviations section. If it wasn’t can you please let me know which pattern so I can fix this? Thank you! Rhondda
BLsc ? Back loop sc st?
Hi April, I’m sorry you’ve been so through so much with your Crohn’s Disease but I am happy to hear you are doing a bit better lately 🙂 I haven’t tried juicing yet but I think that might be a fantastic idea for me too 🙂 I also found more processed foods were easier for my system to handle especially when my Crohn’s was at it’s worst – when I was really sick I admit peanut butter became one of my best choices. It gave me energy and fat (bad!) and proteins and because of the processing it didn’t make my system angry and it like other more processed foods stayed in my system longer than whole foods. It almost seems like the more processing the bowels needed to do the more quickly they tried to get rid of it and the less I was able to absorb and use for my own nutrition – if that makes any sense at all. Something that I’ve been using for a few years (almost 8!) and swear by is PGX – it is a fiber supplement developed in Toronto, Canada (at one of the Universities) and it has made a huge difference for me. I only take two of them a day but it has decreased my bathroom time significantly. I used to visit 6-8 times a day and now only 1 to 2 times a day. Sorry if that as ‘too much information’!! It took my system about 3 days to get used to it (cramping from the fiber I think) and then it was fine and has been ever since. I actually know very few people who have Crohn’s Disease – so I thank you for commenting and letting me know I’m not alone in this either! All the best in 2018, Rhondda
That’s a very moving story! Without going into details, all your troubles mirror mine greatly as far as your health is concerned. I too suffer with Crohn’s. I was diagnosed in my late 20’s, but was ill all during my youth. Just a kid with a “nervous ” stomach. Hard to diagnose, perennial abcesses and three surgeries, blockages, bowel resection, depression, now a narrowing at the surgical site causing more blockages. Silent. No one knows what it feels like to be the person that wears a diaper to bed. All who see you doesn’t not know what goes on behind the scenes and some thinks that pulling on your big gal panties is the ticket. I’ve found relief through ordering my Vitamix and juicing, thereby giving the gut a time out. Pre-digested food… It has helped. Pain and depression go together. Recently I’ve been able to work again after 4 years. I article with the fear. What if the unthinkable happens when I sneeze… Things like that. I empathize and sympathize totally and congratulate you for not letting it trample you completely. I enjoy your posts and look forward to what new pattern may be waiting in my email. So don’t you think there aren’t those of us out here looking forward to their daily dose of Oombawka (always wondered where the name came from; great story!). Take for sharing. Always great to hear another Crohn’s story so as not to feel alone in the world…